billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
