69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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