I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
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