my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
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