Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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