Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
