Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
