There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
