Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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