We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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