fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
