I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize