It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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