So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
