dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Found the puke drawer
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
