we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
