There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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