Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
