would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize