Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You have to summon your inner elephant
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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