im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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