you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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