I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
