I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Panties = found
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