she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
