ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
50% drunk capacity currently
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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