I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
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