She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
