Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
well most of my day revolves around power hour
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
