So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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