YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
