Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
