I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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