You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
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