theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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