I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
