her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
