I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
the raccoons are back...
Randomize