u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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