My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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