well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
