Well douche your snatch and let's go!
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
