so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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