I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
