Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
