What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
