my soul wont recognize me after tonight
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
