Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
