Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize