fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
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