she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I think a kid would responsible me up
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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