Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
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