Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
