I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
This is classic penis vs brain.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
